That smile is for me.
Love seems to be an oversaturated concept, sometimes.
What is love? Who do you love? How do you know if you love someone? Do you love them, or are you “in love” with them? Can you love someone less over time? Is it still love at that point? What if you love someone more over time…what does that look like?
I’ll tell you what it looks like: it looks like believing in someone so much that you are completely vulnerable with them to handle your joys, your fears, your anxieties, your success and your failures.
And there is nothing you would enjoy more than to share theirs with them.
I know Ben loves me because…
- When he smiles at me, it is a very different smile. It isn’t a polite smile, or even a happy smile. It is a huge smile that goes down to the pit of his soul, and I love it. And it is just for me.
- He rubs my head while we watch “Halt and Catch Fire” together.
- He has the kids pick out what flowers to bring mom when they are at the store together.
- He goes to Costco all the time, because I hate it. (the experience, not the store. I love Costco. I hate crowds.)
- He loves my cooking.
- 16 years, and he is still wearing kilts. Granted, he likes them already….but I love them.
- He listens to my crazy ideas with an open mind, and even agrees with some of them. For some reason.
- He never mentions that I am behind on laundry, even when he can’t find a clean towel in the morning.
- He will dance with me anywhere.
- We still have epic plans for the future.
- He looks incredibly hot chopping wood. In a kilt. Life is very good.
- He tells me all his ideas, on everything, and I love listening to them.
- He shares his best Islay scotch with me, even though I don’t appreciate it like he does. (#bourbon)
- He understands me better than anyone, especially myself.
- He always makes sure I am wearing “good, sensible shoes.”
- He sincerely thinks I am the most beautiful woman on earth.
Love has a lot to do with trusting someone to love you, and trusting yourself to love them with everything you got.
16 years of marriage is no easy ride, regardless of how much fun we’re having along the way. We have built a home for ourselves. We have gotten cars together, and broken cars together. We went through college together…well, we also graduated High School together. We have stayed up late talking about our relationship with each other, and we have stayed up late talking about our relationships with God with each other. I understand that he really (really) hates clutter on the floor, and he understands that I will keep bringing home little animals for as long as there are little animals on the earth. We have discovered life-altering, incurable diseases together. We have spent nights, and days, in the ER and hospitals (mostly me). We have brought 5 incredible lives into our lives together. He believes in me, and I am so proud of him.
And when he smiles at me, I am still struck with how happy he makes me every day.
Here’s to the next 84 years discovering life together 🙂